loneliness in the modern world | you are not alone
Despite being more connected than ever, many people today feel isolated, unheard or simply alone. If that’s how you’ve been feeling, please know, you’re not the only one. Loneliness is one of the most common, and most quietly carried, struggles in modern life.
As a counsellor based in Farnham, I regularly work with people facing this very challenge, whether it’s crept in slowly or followed a major life change. Whatever your circumstances, you don’t have to face it alone.
what does loneliness really mean?
Loneliness isn’t just about being physically alone, it’s about not feeling emotionally connected. It’s the feeling of being unseen, misunderstood or left out, even in the presence of others.
In 2024, 7.8% of UK adults reported feeling lonely "always or often" (ONS data) and 1 in 5 adults feel lonely at least once a week.
why is loneliness on the rise?
There’s no single reason. For some, loneliness follows a bereavement, break-up, or move to a new area. For others, it’s the result of long-term disconnection, even while busy with work or family.
Contributing factors include:
remote working - less daily interaction with others
social media – increased visibility, but decreased meaningful connection
online gaming and digital spaces – while often social, they can sometimes deepen offline isolation.
A 2021 study found that heavy gaming is linked to increased loneliness, especially in younger adults (PLOS One).life changes – retirement, parenthood, or moving home
stigma – it’s still hard for many to talk about feeling lonely
Even in a friendly town like Farnham, many people quietly struggle to connect or find their place, especially after a big life transition.
you are not alone
• 1 in 5 adults feels lonely at least once a week.
• Local Farnham community groups (book clubs, walking meet‑ups, parent & toddler groups) can be a gentle first step back into connection. More suggestions on metal health locally
• Small acts, saying hello to a neighbour, joining a class, volunteering all add up and help you to feel more connected.
practical ways to ease loneliness
start small: Send a text or ask a friend for coffee.
join a group: Farnham library hosts regular meet‑ups; the community centre runs art & gardening clubs. More suggestions on metal health locally
volunteer locally: Helping others fosters connection and purpose.
balance screen time: Set specific “offline” hours to encourage real‑world interaction.
it’s okay to ask for help
Counselling isn’t about fixing you; it’s about supporting you to find your own path back to connection.
how counselling can help
Loneliness can affect self-esteem, relationships, and even physical health. In counselling, you can explore these feelings safely and honestly, without judgment.
Together, we can:
explore the roots of your loneliness
rebuild your confidence and sense of worth
understand the emotional patterns that keep you feeling stuck
open up to connection—first with yourself, then with others
Sometimes, being truly heard is the first step back toward feeling less alone.
Counselling in Farnham | You’re Welcome Here
If loneliness is something you’re facing, I offer a warm, non-judgmental space to help you reconnect, with yourself and others. I see clients from across Farnham and the surrounding areas, both in person and online.
Research:
Office for National Statistics – Loneliness in the UK (2024)
PLOS One – Online Gaming and Loneliness (2021)